Saturday, May 3, 2008

Soriano: Joker or Jacker or BOTH?

I did some quick math in my head and decided that Soriano has to hit 4 HRs AND steal at least one base for every fly ball he drops.

IF he was still hitting homers - he got one the other night and IF he steals bases - he stole one today and IF he gets on base in the lead-off spot - no signs of this BTW - then he can open up a lemonade stand in left for all I care.

That's a lot of ifs but I do love lemonade...

Friday, May 2, 2008

Tricky SI Curses Cubs in Japanese!

I wasn't going to say anything.

After seeing the latest SI cover highlighting Fukudome and the Cubs proclaiming that "It's Gonna Happen" I decided to keep my mouth shut. Ignore it. Don't even pick the damn thing up! Maybe the jinx wouldn't land on the Northside.

After all, the Cubbies had been on a hot streak since Alphonso Soriano hopped onto the DL and Reed Johnson took over centerfield/leadoff duties. The Cubs were near the top of the league in OBP, team BA and wins. Even Jason Marquis was starting to pitch well.

But now that the jinx seems in full effect - I thought I'd actually touch the magazine and to my horror discovered SI's little trick.

It wasn't Sweet Lou's insistence on batting Soriano in the leadoff spot - OR - Alphonso's shaky fielding. It wasn't even Kerry Wood's tenuous hold on the closer role. It actually had nothing to do with the Cubs at all. SI did this to the Cubs on purpose.

On the SI cover the Japanese text supposedly said "It's Gonna Happen" but after brushing off my "Japanese for Sailors" manual the translating error was exposed.

"Great, Now We're F#@ked"

Thank you SI and all you Cardinal fans who must be working in SIs binding factories. You certainly aren't writers.

You got us this time but we'll be back. As soon as Soriano's hamstring pops - look out!