Monday, March 16, 2009

Goat, 1 Billion Chickens Unite to Curse Cubs

Reason Why We'll Never Win
It's pretty bad when a statue associated with losing and fried chicken is pulled out of a river half the world away and the first thing those foreigners think of is "Hey, Give it to the Cubs!"

Even worse is having PETA - those fine folks who can read the thoughts of animals (but only the negative ones) - send an "urgent" letter to your front office threatening the animosity of every chicken ever abused by KFC if the statue is accepted.

I guess 25 years ago fans celebrating the Hanshin Tigers championship win chucked a statue of Colonel Sanders into the river outside the stadium. The statue was recently pulled out and apparently offered to the Cubs to help them throw of the curse of a goat??

PETA's urgent letter asks the Cubs to not accept the statue and claims that - " if a monument to the ultimate symbol of cruelty to animals—KFC's Colonel Sanders—is accepted by the Cubs, it could unleash a curse whose wrath is too terrible to contemplate."

Frankly, I don't give a rats ass about the wrath of a billion chickens (I find them finicky with no attention to detail) or one measly goat but together who knows what carnage these two un-related species could wreak on Sweet Lou's carefully constructed Righty-Lefty lineup. Any Cub fan who has ever had a goat cheese omelette or had a breakfast gyro knows these two species teaming up are dynamite... We are doomed.

1 comment:

Brian said...

There is no curse.